Things to consider if you chose daycare

While the daycare/preschool option is an affordable and attractive choice (multiple qualified adults in a controlled setting), there are things a parent needs to understand. I take it upon myself to lay out this information in black and white because the school director who ropes the parents in and makes the initial introductions will neglect to tell the parent anything useful and will assume that they will read the lengthy paperwork and memorize all the ground rules.

This is bullshit.

I can only speak for the centers I have worked in, which have varied from small and homey to large and corporate, so keep in mind that while the practices I am about to describe don't happen everywhere, it's very likely that at least some of it is going down in your local daycare.

Labels: Everything, absolutely everything needs to be labeled. Ryan's blanket with the train on it didn't come home at the end of the week? You want us to find it? Good luck. Aside from looking in the most obvious spaces and asking whatever other teacher works in that room, we're not going to do much more than sit and wait for it to turn up. For older kids its easy enough to ask them who any given object belongs to. If I find myself covering for a teacher in another room I will typically rely on the oldest and most vocal child in the class to tell me where things go if there is no obvious label. In a baby room, everything down to the nipple of the bottle should be labeled. If you don't want to deal with all of that then pre-make the bottles and send them in. When we have to wash things they get taken apart and mixed in with everyone else's, and "whose Dr. Brown bottle straw is this?" is not a fun game. Its easy to take for granted that everything in your house belongs to your children, but imagine the bottle parts for 8 babies floating around in a dishwasher...20 sippy cups all featuring Dora, Diego or what have you, 30 tupperware pieces and a slew of other things. 15 seconds with a shaprie before leaving the house goes a long way in insuring that your own belongings make their way back home.

Art work: If a teacher puts a piece of your child's art in your bag, cubby, art folder or wherever it happens to be stored when we're done admiring it...please take it home. We don't care what you do with it once it gets there...just please take it away. Every inch of a classroom is valuable real estate and we can't be battling with a store of artwork ranging from Halloween to Easter in the cubby area.

"The Bag": Whether its the diaper bag or the backpack each child should have one. In this bag there needs to be a change of clothes, hopefully multiple changes of clothes, all seasonally appropriate and well fitting. Callie got pudding all down her shirt, but the only clothes in her diaper bag are pants and a tank top...and it's November...that's a problem. Amanda pooped through her outfit today and didn't have any clothes at all? This doesn't reflect well on the parents. Babies have diaper leaking incidents, kids get messy and a daycare has a limited supply of clothing (usually the contents of the lost and found from years past). Not bringing a child in with a spare set of clothes is like bringing them in without a lunch.

Sounds harsh, and I know parents are busy and rushed, but so are teachers. To be honest, we don't have time to go hunting for something appropriate for your child to wear for the rest of the day. It is stressful enough trying to take care of my allotted amount of children without the extra responsibility of trying to find a needle in a haystack, or a 6 month sized outfit in a daycare.

Pick-up: In most daycares a parent pays for either full time or part time, not hourly. This causes most parents to think that if they get out of work at 3pm, they don't have to pick their child up from work until later because they're paying for them to be there anyways. I understand this, I really do, but there needs to be a scheduled drop off and pick up time. Teachers need to know this so we can make sure there are enough people to cover ratio. If I have 4 babies scheduled to be dropped off before 8am when the other teacher is scheduled to come in that's perfect timing. If a parent drops their child off an hour early and throws off the ratio timing, there's a problem that could potentially lead to your child's class not being in ratio and being unsafe.

So the rule of thumb is, if you need to drop off early or pick up late, please let the daycare know ahead of time so the appropriate staff can be provided. A daycare can't pay a teacher just to hang around in case a classroom accidentally goes over, it is a business after all.

Sickness: If your child goes home sick there needs to be 24 hours symptom free before they can come back. This is a pretty standard policy to insure that as few children as possible come into contact with illness. And please don't medicate them and drop them off anyways, we can tell. If they're teething or have allergies and not contagious don't assume it's ok to bring them in anyways. If it's bad and they need extra love and attention than they really need to be home or with a relative. A school environment can be stressful on a child that doesn't feel well.

Parent-Teacher Communication: We work for your child, true they don't sign our paychecks but everything we do is in their interest. If something comes up, vaccinations, family issues, a bump on the head from the night before, anything that would alter their behavior that day, the teachers need to be aware. I once had a little girl in a 4's classroom who was being medicated at home for her asthma. Since she did not need medication while in school we had no idea that the medication she was on is one that is known to cause irritability. So for over a week we thought she was going through a tough spell and testing her limits, we responded by being extremely firm and correcting every poor behavior. After hearing about the 5th "rough day" in a row the mother casually mentioned the medication. Well jeez...if we had known she was on such strong meds that affect her mood and behavior so much we would have gone a little easier on her. A child who has a tantrum because she's on medications should be held and talked to with soothing words, not sent to time out. Another older child from the after school program began acting out and it eventually escalated to the point where he had to be put in an empty classroom and left to throw around spare furniture because the safety of other children and teachers were at risk, after many frustrating days with the child the mother was finally "made" to sit down and discuss her child's actions and she confessed it was due to a divorce in the works. While this is generally a private matter parents should always be open with the child's teacher. Whatever is said is kept private and only shared with teachers so they can be aware of the problem and try to help the child by giving one on one attention and a healthy outlet for his feelings. Honesty is always best, it may be embarrassing to tell a practical stranger about problems at home but that is one thing we will not judge you on.